Critical Theory Questions

I'm really confused about the feminist critique. Well not confused, but it's just the one critical theory I am struggling with.

Themes

I'm not really sure if lonliness is a theme or not. It's the only real one that sticks out to me however. Everyone at The Flowers is plagued by some sort of emptiness or lonliness. The Flowers actually kind of reminds me of rehab. I've never been to rehab, but it just seems like all these people who collectively feel the same or have a common struggle are forced to be in this one place. I really don't think rehab is too helpful because of that reason, but I can't judge that. Anyway, everyone in The Flowers seems to be experiencing lonliness, even if they are in fact not alone, and even surrounded by a community. Sonny, for example is the prime carrier of this theme. He is very distant with everyone, and even though he brings a lot of it on himself, he is still lonely. Cindy binds to Sonny. It's kind of like a "You're unhappy I'm unhappy so we can make each other happy" kind of deal. But that's really the worst deal you could make. Cindy is very lonely and pines for the attention of others because she is unhappily married. Sonny's mom Silvia, who is also married, feels like her freedom is in danger and feels estranged from her husband and family. Nika's verbal abuse from her father seperates her from her family and because of the abuse she suffers, believes she will always feel unworthy and in turn, be lonely. Clloyd is even lonely. His constant control over Sylvia is backfiring in a way and he begins to feel like because he doesn't have control over her, he is distant from her. We can see him in the story being concerned about her, but it doesn't seem like it's for her well-being, but more for his own re-assurance. Lonliness seems to be a prominent theme between all the people in The Flowers.

Personal comparison to The Flowers

I really relate to Sonny's desperation to go to France. For me, it's not just France, but to travel all around the world and see different cultures, and live how they live. What i relate to even more is the fact that no one quite takes Sonny seriously with his dreams. My family really does support me, but when I read a quote from Clloyd in response to Sonny it was almost like hearing it verbatim from others. Clloyd said with a smile on his face, "The boy don't think cheap, I give that to him." (Pg 14) The kind of mock behavior which is logically sound is disheartening. Both sonny and I have thought about the expenses and just how unattainable it may be for young people, but the dream far exceeds that aspect. In a reader response, Sonny's break-ins are kind of parallel to his dream of visiting France. He breaks in to other people's homes around him, in his neighborhood, to view their different cultures, relationships, etc. Since he can't escape to somewhere he desires, he settles for fulfilling a part of his curiosity and dream this way. While a lot of people think it's weird, and in a way it kind of is, Sonny's passion for France should be appreciated. Many teachers, counselors, and elders have told me to take advantage of my youth and see the world. I think Sonny may feel subconsciously trapped as well. With his mom being so young and beautiful, and witnessing the odd or seemingly damaged relationships of those around him, I believe he fears growing up in the same enviornment. Since Paris is such a different setting, he yearns for a place so opposite of the disfunctional establishment he calls home.

Character Description

Silvia

• Distant/detatched
• Confused
• Feeling of being "trapped"

My mother never

stops worrying. In the past, it was very troublesome. I felt constricted in comparison to all my other friends' families. But now i'm gaining insight to my mother's worrying. Her whole life she's been a caretaker. Growing up it was for her family, taking care of her younger siblings while both parents worked for the army. Then she became a teacher. Then a wife. Then a mother. Her whole life has always revolved around the safety, happiness, and well being of others. So much could go wrong. In a sense, she is very obsessive compulsive about habits, rituals, and the infamous 3 or 4 calls when I may be late by 10 minutes. As the years progress, i notice these traits in myself. I'm not entirely disturbed by them anymore. My mother worries because her compassion is overwhelming. And I'd rather have a mother who obsesses over my well being, than one who wouldn't give a rat's ass. My mother never stops worrying, and I secretly love that.
But sometimes I feel like slipping her a xanax. But only out of the deepest love I have for her.

Who Am I?

I am Kim. I'm in your english 1B class. I'm having an identity crisis.
My brother and I have the same birthday but we're exacltly four years apart. All my life I have grown up as the one and only sibling that ruined his peter pan party. The guilt tears me up inside.
I'm going to school to get a career to get paid to travel. What that is yet? I don't know.
My passions are poetry, art, music, travel, and the simple things in life.
I'm actually really interesting, supposedly, but I'm really terrible at these introduction things, and my taquitos are done. I'll see you in class!
So, I have to write more. Here it is! I'm currently 19 years old but about to turn 20. I live in Morgan Hill. I have a dog named buster who is really awesome, and I used to have a pet rat... sir edward... but he passed on a couple months ago. I work in retail. I am currently undecided on my major, and can't decide between the medical field, travel industry, screenwriting or some kind of writing, forensics, or becoming a pastry chef. Unfortunately for me, I have a lot of ambitions and I'm quite impulsive. So I guess I'm trying to figure out the who am I question myself. I was the one who screamed the other day in class about the pop up on the computer. I am easily frightened by sudden noises or actions. Once in a movie theatre, I accidently grabbed the guy's knee sitting next to me when something jumped out in a suspensful scene. His wife wasn't too happy. I tend to think of myself as a creative type. I'm a mash up of all different spectrums however. If I could sing or play an instrument well, I'd love to be a musician. I'm a cynical optimist. In general, I hate people, but really deperately and genuinely try to be the best human being I can possibly be and to better understand people. I'm actually really friendly. I just might be a bit too sarcastic for some people.
I'm a nerd. Not really a geek, but a nerd. There's a difference. I'm still struggling to figure out aspects of my new smart phone, but I can talk with you about star trek, Lord  of the Rings, and comic books quite well. I just tried a chalupa from taco bell, so I guess you can say I like to try new things. (By the way.. it's like a pita taco. I don't know) By now, I'm rambling on about stuff you probably haven't wanted to read, unless you really are that interested in me. So for pete's sake, comment on my blog so I don't feel like a total embarassment. =)